The Langbehn-Pond Family ~ the accidental activists

since hearing a little after 1pm (9.29.09) my time today that Judge Jordan (Federal Judge in Florida) sided with the hospital (Jackson Memorial Hospital – Ryder Trauma Center)

my world has crumbled, my heart was stabbed just like watching Lisa collapsing all over again on the Rfamily cruise on 2/18/07

words of encouragement have poured in from friends, family and others to say “hang in there -the fight is just starting”.

and then our son David – saying “mom that’s messed up – if we were here in Group Health we could have been with other mom but because we were in Florida we couldn’t – how is that fair – shouldn’t the laws me the same in all the states” he is only 14 and has some learning delays – what does that say about our society, our laws, and how we wrong others every day if my 14 year old son can see it’s “not fair”

I honestly don’t know how I pick myself up and put on a brave face for public speaking that has always been very trying and hard for me even before this decision – now it will be augmented with an asterisk that says *but she failed in court*

I know there are people who disagreed that I should never have filed the lawsuit to begin with, that to let the dead lay in rest.  I couldn’t – I never could – I always picked at those wounds on my arms or face hoping for a different outcome.  Speaking out about the inequality we faced was no difference.

the kids are in bed, the house is quiet and now I’m stuck with my thoughts with the overwhelming feeling of failure of not only NOT being at Lisa side but also not prevailing to change policy so other family’s didn’t have to face what we did.

Yes I try to remember the 1000′s of people who have read about or heard me speak or the 4 people’s lives that Lisa saved but none of that right at this very moment comfort me.

I was selfish I wanted to win so that – you – gay or straight – could be with your loved one as well as bring in your children to hold you loved ones hand while they could sense you – so that you could begin the grieving process – but all was for not.  I am sorry.

The one thing I am not sorry about in the least is for Lambda Legal taking our case, listening to me for hours – assigning Beth Littrell and co-counsel Don Hayden to our case – our case was in the best of hand.  I couldn’t have hoped for better, caring, legal minds on our case.  My sense of failure has NOTHING to do with my representation – but solely with me.  Thank you all from Lambda  - Beth, Lisa, Jon, Tika, Erin, Don H., Kevin, Jon, Judi, Rick and so many others who have been there every step of the way – and if I forgot anyone forgive me.

And again thank you to Rosie and Kelli O’Donnell for their continued support.

peace always

our lisa:

A federal court has dismissed a lawsuit by a lesbian who was banned by a Florida hospital from being with her life partner during her final hours.

Lisa Pond, Janice Langbehn and their three adopted children were on a gay “R Family” cruise in February 2007 when Pond, 39, suffered a brain aneurysm that led to her being hospitalized.

Despite the couple having the necessary legal forms, officials at Jackson Memorial Hospital in Miami allegedly prevented Langbehn and the couple’s children from seeing Pond during her final hours. Hospital officials allegedly informed Langbehn that she was in an anti-gay city and state, and that they would not recognize her power of attorney authority.

Here is Lambda Legal’s complete press release on today’s ruling:

The United States District Court for the Southern District of Florida today rejected Lambda Legal’s lawsuit filed against Jackson Memorial Hospital on behalf of Janice Langbehn, the Estate of Lisa Pond and their three adopted children who were kept apart by hospital staff for eight hours as Lisa slipped into a coma and died.

“The court’s decision paints a tragically stark picture of how vulnerable same-sex couples and their families really are during times of crisis,” said Beth Littrell, Staff Attorney in Lambda Legal’s Southern Regional Office based in Atlanta. “We hope that because of Janice’s courage to seek justice for her family in this case that more people better understand the costs of antigay discrimination. This should never happen to anyone.”

While on a family cruise leaving from Miami, Lisa Pond, a healthy 39 year-old, suddenly collapsed. She was rushed to Miami’s Jackson Memorial Hospital with her partner Janice and three children following close behind. There, the hospital refused to accept information from Janice about her partner’s medical history. Janice was informed that she was in an antigay city and state, and she could expect to receive no information or acknowledgment as Lisa’s partner or family. A doctor finally spoke with Janice telling her that there was no chance of recovery. Other than one five minute visit that was arranged by a Catholic priest at Janice’s request to perform last rites, and despite the doctor’s acknowledgement that no medical reason existed to prevent visitation, neither Janice – who provided the hospital with a medical Power of Attorney document — nor their children were allowed to see Lisa until nearly eight hours after their arrival. Soon after Lisa’s death, Janice tried to get her death certificate in order to get life insurance and Social Security benefits for their children. She was denied both by the State of Florida and the Dade County Medical Examiner.

Today’s ruling comes after the Public Health Trust of the Miami Dade County, the governing body of Jackson Memorial Hospital, filed a motion to dismiss the case. The court ruled that the hospital has neither an obligation to allow their patients’ visitors nor any obligation whatsoever to provide their patients’ families, healthcare surrogates, or visitors with access to patients in their trauma unit. The court has given the Langbehn-Pond family until October 16 to review the ruling and consider all legal options.

Beth Littrell, Staff Attorney in Lambda Legal’s Southern Regional Office in Atlanta is lead counsel on the case for Lambda Legal. She is joined by co-counsel Donald J. Hayden of Baker & McKenzie, LLP.