from rosie true colors tshirt to me adding to it.. I’ll see if I can get the kids to do it also

she was born 15 years ago today,

we did not know of her yet

she was small, dependent and sent home with her birth mom

later she was put in foster care to protect her from the mom that gave her life

she was in her “forever home” when we met her at 3 so she could meet her brother for the first time

strikeningly similiar in every way they where

then the call came in may 1998, “can you take her?”

without hesitation lisa said yes, and i called to increase our foster license

her first 6 months were rough, she spoke so little even at 4 1/2yo

she didn’t see herself in pictures, went to special ed pre-school

then she came into her own, became confident

a beautiful little girl, with long dark hair, incredible brown eyes - all knowing

she is 15 years today and those early years seem both just yesterday and long ago

she is in high school, well grounded, beautiful, confident and we are blessed to

have been called to raise her precious soul

happy birthday danielle

i scanned in the pics for this movie several weeks ago - and always need a song that i think fits -Josh Radin sings.  these pictures I found in lisa’s night stand about 2 months ago in a small album.  it’s a strange collection - but many firsts were in there.. katie’s and david’s first trip tot he cape.  david walking with papa the first time at skaget beach.  danielle’s first time at the cape.  david and michael sharing their first halloween.  chris’ first trip here - years ago for thanksgiving - chris’ famous (or family famous) - ice cream face at pilgrim lake.  or even before we had danielle she was about 3 - in another foster home and finally convinced the department for michael to meet her - which he did - it’s the pic of them sitting together.  So strange that we would get that little soul about a year later in our / her permanent family.  Skiing at Lake Tahoe, our last trip to Ocean Shores with our first daughter rose - and of course w/ lisa’s love - kachess/heidi our sheepdogs.  The list goes on.  I did add a few newer ones so you could the changes in the kids.. but other than about 3pics.. these are all the ones she had put away in a small single page turning album that had a broken spine.

I’m not sure why lisa had these certain pictures, but i never doubt her wisdom, they wouldn’t all fit in one movie so i will do another soon.  i hope you enjoy as i did, wondering what these meant to her and us as a family.  enjoy - happy thanksgiving all

peace

on sunday, david was my “date” as we headed to vashon island.  Side note - i had not been there since september 1996 - at the end of the first summer after michael moved in we went up there for the holiday weekend to a B and B.  So I wanted to go to see “for my wife” a documentary.  Charlene lost her wife Kate Fleming on 12/14/06 when the horrible storm we had that week had flooded their basement where Kate recorded books on tape.  As Kate was lifted out of the completely flooded basement, Charlene followed to harborview in Seattle and was barred from seeing Kate until reaching a blood relative.  (sound familiar?)

When a relative was reached, Charlene was let in to say goodbye to her wife Kate.. and then just a month later testified before the state committee here in WA looking to pass the WA state domestic partnership registry - which did pass thanks to Charlene’s testimony.   If you ever have the privilege to watch all of the documentary - do.

here is the promo video, enjoy

In Brief: What Democracy Looks Like

FROM NOVEMBER 2008 ENEWS (VOL.5, NO.11)

There has been a lot of anger and disbelief expressed since a slim majority of voters passed Prop 8 in California; in many communities, LGBT people and our allies have taken to the streets to express outrage. After so much love and joy had been celebrated, antigay forces spent millions of dollars on lies and deception to try to take marriage away from us on Election Day. But this is not over: the very next day, we began fighting back.

We don’t think this is the way democracy is supposed to work in California, and we are going to court to stop Prop 8 from taking effect. Lambda Legal, the National Center for Lesbian Rights (NCLR) and the ACLU are representing Equality California and six same-sex couples. The heart of our legal argument boils down to this: A fundamental liberty of a minority group is being stripped away by a simple majority vote. This makes the equal protection clause of the constitution meaningless. Can you do that in California with one vote? We don’t think so.

California’s constitution requires a different process. In order to make a fundamental revision to the constitution that would change the way state government works in California, the revision must first, at a minimum, be approved by a two- thirds vote of each chamber of the legislature, and it then must be sent to the people for a vote.

Why is there a more difficult process required to make the change intended by Prop 8? We all learned about it in grade school: The framers of both the federal and the California constitutions understood that a primary function of the courts and constitutions is to protect minority groups from the will of the majority when it comes to fundamental rights. Can 51 percent of the people vote to take away the free speech rights of women, but not of men? We don’t think so. Can 51 percent of the people vote to say that Christians are free to worship as they choose, but people of other faiths may not? Not a chance.

If Prop 8 were implemented, it would fundamentally change the meaning of the constitution and the role of the courts in protecting fundamental rights. Prop 8 passed through only the initiative process without a two-thirds vote of the legislature. That’s why it’s invalid.

After this incredible and emotional election, we take both the long and short view. The long view shows that both public opinion and history are moving steadily in the right direction. The election of Barack Obama as president proves that change is possible and that prejudice can be overcome. Fifty years ago, black Americans still lived in segregated communities and were blocked both from voting and equal opportunities for employment. Only 40 years ago, the U.S. Supreme Court decided Loving v.Virginia, striking down the remaining laws banning interracial marriages, and now we have elected a president who is the child of an interracial marriage. And only eight years ago, the original Prop 22 (the Knight Initiative) that banned marriage for same-sex couples in California passed by a nearly two-to-one margin (61 to 38 percent), while this year Prop 8 barely passed by two percentage points. The long view gives us hope and a vision of the future.

In the short view, we are confronting bitter losses not only in California but also in Florida, Arizona and Arkansas, and we’re fighting back because our relationships and families deserve dignity and respect. We are preparing for oral arguments before the Iowa Supreme Court to defend our marriage-equality victory there, and we are seeking justice for Janice Langbehn, who was not allowed to see her dying partner in a hospital in Miami.

In fighting back against the injustice of Prop 8 and the other ballot measures that targeted LGBT people, we stand together with other groups that have faced discrimination, not against them. People of color and people of all faiths have fought for freedom and are part of our LGBT communities across the country. Divide and conquer is the oldest political strategy in the world. If we fall victim to it, the extreme right will have won a lot more than this year’s ballot measures.

As we anticipate the inauguration of the 44th American president, we are not simply waiting for change to come to us, we are working for it — through community education, by preparing for the political struggles ahead, and by doing what Lambda Legal does best — making the case for equality in our courts. This is what democracy looks like.

Another LL reference:

http://data.lambdalegal.org/publications/downloads/fs_victories-across-the-country.pdf

why do I still listen to this damn show while cleaning.. I found myself yelling at the stupid 5 (and usually I like whoopi and joy) and throwing socks I just mated at the TV. Joy talked about a friend who is GAY in the hospital and how the partner had to say they was the sister to be allowed in. UGH - and then all five stupid women said but if you just put it on paper - living Will it would be ok. OH NO - thanks for perpetuating the ignorance. Lisa and I had Living Wills and Power of Attorneys that were IGNORED at Jackson Memorial. But please if you are Gay - do make sure that you have a living will and Medical Power of Attorney - I’m not saying ignore that - I’m not a lawyer but probably married individuals should have one - look at the Terry Shiavo case in Florida - or maybe the problem is florida. Regardless, writing it down you stupid 5 doesn’t ensure that gay partners will see each other - or make the medical decision. Maybe in more progressive states it doesn’t matter - but like we found out you don’t only sit at home right? so have your legal paperwork done, regardless of who you love. And gay individuals don’t be shocked when you are denied by those in power - even with the legal paperwork done. Hence why I felt it necessary to reach out to LAMBDA to make sure YOU don’t go through what Lisa and our family did. Peace

Danielle is the videographer, with help of the GWL staff who couldn’t believe she was going to video going down the slide.  I only trusted her not to loose it on the way down.. sorry no video of the boys.  it’s best with the volume way up enjoy

the kids have been asking to go to the Great Wolfe Lodge about 20mins south of us.  So I allowed them to spend the day at the water park and invite one friend.  They, I believe, had a blast.  they were so tired when we got home, mine took a nap.  Pics will be up shortly as well as pics I didn’t get up of Danielle in soccer.  She starts freshman High School Ball tomorrow.  Not sure how it’s all going to work - here school is being remoldeled and there is only 1 partial gym for all the teams, I expect it will be hectic and she’ll be at other middle and grade schools for practice.  Katie will start with a Saturday clinic this coming week, no word on David where he wil play - for now he will play for Lacey Parks then mid January, he will start with Komachin (since Waldorf doesn’t offer sports, the kids are eligible to play on the public school teams).  Had a good talk with Michael, and working with his staff to drive him down here for thanksgiving.  We will keep our fingers crossed. Peace

Dear Friends:

I got sucker punched last Tuesday night and I’m just now getting up off the mat.

We knew it was possible that the supporters of Prop 8 might succeed, but Scarlett and I got married anyway - on August 5, our 16th anniversary. We donated our time and money, especially in the last month before the election, to help ensure that this hateful piece of legislation would not pass. I worked as a poll inspector on Election Day, cheering as my fellow citizens and I said yes to the new opportunities presented by the election of our first black president.

Then I came home, turned on the television, and discovered that I was officially, legally, constitutionally a second-class citizen. That my relationship is a threat to “real” marriages and therefore the citizens of California, and by extension the nation, needed to be protected. From me. I wanted to throw up.

In case you are unclear about what’s at stake, below are just four of the 1,138 federal laws that pertain to married couples but are not allowed for domestic partners or civil unions. The language comes from FactCheck.org, a non-partisan website of the Annenberg Foundation:

• Taxes. Couples in a civil union may file a joint state tax return, but they must file federal tax returns as single persons. This may be advantageous to some couples, not so for others. One advantage for married couples is the ability to transfer assets and wealth without incurring tax penalties. Partners in a civil union aren’t permitted to do that, and thus may be liable for estate and gift taxes on such transfers.
• Health insurance. The state-federal divide is even more complicated in this arena. In the wake of the Massachusetts high court ruling, the group Gay & Lesbian Advocates & Defenders put together a guide to spousal health care benefits. GLAD’s document is Massachusetts-specific but provides insight into how health insurance laws would apply to those in a civil union in other states. In general, GLAD says, it comes down to what’s governed by state law and what’s subject to federal oversight. If a private employer’s health plans are subject to Massachusetts state insurance laws, benefits must be extended to a same-sex spouse. If the health plan is governed by federal law, the employer can choose whether or not to extend such benefits.
• Social Security survivor benefits. If a spouse or divorced spouse dies, the survivor may have a right to Social Security payments based on the earnings of the married couple, rather than only the survivor’s earnings. Same-sex couples are not eligible for such benefits.
• Portable Unions. Since civil unions are only legal in certain states, they also can’t be taken across state lines. If a couple gets married in Vermont, they can reasonably expect to still be married if they move to California; the same is not true for same-sex unions. While New Jersey law specifies that the state will recognize civil unions and domestic partnerships performed elsewhere, this is not true for all states that allow some form of same-sex partnership. And if civil partners move to a state that disallows all same-sex unions, they may find themselves with no legal standing whatsoever as a couple.

This is not, nor has it ever been, about what churches can or must sanction, what schools can or must teach their students, or any of the other lies that have been around since before I was in college and Anita Bryant was the face of homophobia in Florida. This is simply a call to recognize, once and for all, that separate but equal is inherently untenable in a country founded on the premise of justice for all, and that the obligation of an independent judiciary is to protect the rights of the minority from the vagaries of the majority.

As for Prop 8, there is plenty of finger pointing and blame to go around, and plenty of people to do both. I chose to do neither. Looking backward does not help us to move forward and rancor is a waste of time. Let the courts do their work then we’ll know what our work must be. This is far from over.

Your support in this is no small matter to me, to us, and to our kids. All we want are the same rights that you enjoy, or could if you aren’t married now, but chose to later: the assurance that my property and material goods will go where I designate when I die; the ability to go home to Spokane or Portland to visit our families without wondering if we’re no longer married when we leave Oakland; the chance to be by each other’s side at the end of life without anyone telling us we can’t; and the right to inherit each other’s Social Security. Which of these rights would you be willing to do without?

Last night, Keith Olbermann devoted his “Special Comment” to this debate; I hope you’ll take a moment to watch.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cVUecPhQPqY

Thanks for reading.

With love,
Marilyn

Dear Family Circle Families, 

With the Tournament of Roses Parade less than two months away, the Family Circle Rose Dedication Program would like to thank you for your past participation and invite you to join us again this year in honoring your loved one touched by donation in this very unique and special way.  

This year the theme of the parade, “Hats off to Entertainment” allows us to show the world that donor families, living donors and transplant recipients are “Stars of Life” through organ and tissue donation. Please help us to lovingly honor your star by dedicating a rose in their honor to be placed in the Family Circle Garden. This year the Family Circle Garden will shine in the five gold stars featured on the front of the float. To view the artist rendering of this year’s float go to: 

http://www.donatelifefloat.org/prod/components/images/RP2009_DonateLife_StarsOfLife_5w300dpi_cm

To dedicate a rose online go to:

http://www.donatelifefloat.org/prod/components/family_circle/

Since the start of this program in 2005 we have been honored to serve families and have been personally touched by your dedications. Thank you for being a part of our family and for joining thousands of other families touched by donation who together inspire the nation and the world to donate life.